…I usually hate going that far into thinking….sometimes it feels that the more I think… the more I will get confused… but that came back as I was trying to remember something that happened in the past few days…I couldn’t remember when I exactly did it… and for a moment I was not sure if it really happened or that it happened in my dreams…it must be the fever… that made me have a dream that felt so real.... a certain degree of delirium… this issue is not my problem… the dilemma starts when “brain chemistry” becomes the explanation of such a phenomena… a group of neurotransmitters that go back and forth between the brain cells… I could list their names and the function of each but it wouldn’t matter… the point is that these are the things that control us… that determine if we are happy… if we are sad… ok… not ok…but how does it really work? I mean does it go like this… if we see something that we love … the happiness chemical goes out… so we feel happy…but if it is so… how come we can see the same thing and sometimes it makes us happy and sometimes it is not strong enough to get us out of a bad mood….where is the truth … about everything… and about how we feel about anything…I really don’t know…and talking about it didn’t help with the confusion ………….
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