... سبت القاهرة

أول مرة اكتب بالعربى , ماعتقدش إن ده تغيير فى الشخصية, بس هتابع الموضوع لحسن تكون دى القطرة اللى فى أول الغيث, و يلاقونى فى أعماق المرض النفسى بعد كده.

يوم السبت هو يومى المفضل. طول العشرين سنة اللى فاتوا كان دايما بيحصل فيه حاجة كويسة.

زمان, كانت ماما بتاخدنى نتمشى يوم السبت الصبح, و كنت بجيب الكتب
الصغيرة دى بتاعة ما وراء الطبيعة و ملف المستقبل.(للأمانة أنا لسة بجيب ما وراء الطبيعة لحد دلوقتى).
و فى المدرسة كان هو اليوم اللى بعده الأحد, يوم الأجازة, فكان ممكن انى بعد الظهر أعمل حاجة غير المذاكرة. و ساعات كنت بقعد فى المدرسة لحد الساعة 5,كنا بنعمل زى نشاط كده, تحت اشراف المدرسة طبعا.
و لما اشتغلت, كان يوم السبت جميل لأنه بقى أجازة عند ناس كتير تانيين,فالشوارع بتبقى فاضية, و الطريق سهل و بياخد 25 دقيقة بدل ساعة و نص.
و كمان كان يوم استقبال الوحدة اللى اشتغلت فيها فترة فى سنة الامتياز. كان يوم مرهق... بس جميل, لأننا كنا عارفين بنعمل ايه, و كنا بنتحرك حركة مفيدة و مثمرة, بعيد عن العشوائية و (المهوبصة) اللى كانت بتحصل. و أهم حاجة كنا مع ناس طيبين و محترمين.
الحقيقة الفترة دى كانت حلوة كل اليام مش بس السبت.
و لمل اشتغلت فى المدرسة الأحد كان أجازة, بس كنت بعمل شهادة التربوى, فكنت بروح المهندسين يوم الأحد.
بس السبت كان بردة يوم جميل, لأنه بعد الجمعة, يوم نبطشيتى فى مركز الحياة. كان يوم عظيم لأنه مفيهوش مستشفى و لا أسعاااااف.
و لأنى بردة مع ناس بحترمهم و بحبهم.
السنة دى مفيش "الحياة" و مفيش تربوى. يمكن الجدول زحمة شوية, بس بردة جدول السبت جميل.
أناكتبت الكلام دة من فترة علشان منساش قد ايه ربنا كريم معايا..... بس قلت اشاركه معاكم انهاردة......... السبت.

Black hole….

Sometimes I slip into the black hole of confusion. I try to hold on to an absolute value, so that I can keep my balance and my sanity, but I fail.
Yet, when I stop and think, and imagine that I went back in time, I realize that my choices would be the same. I might do things in a different way, but the corner stone believes in things or in people will always be the same.
Only you God, and my soul praises the lord, you are the only one who knows my heart, you are the only one who knows everything about me, and who understands me better that any.
You are the only one who knows the how? and the why?
And you are the only one whose opinion matters.
Thank you God, you are the most kind and generous.

True….

If you know me for long, then you know how I feel about giving a public speech, and how it was something that stands next to the impossible for me, following that idea, you won't believe that I agreed to give a "first aid" session where the audience was my colleagues at school.
I won't deny it, I was nervous. I was thinking about all the things that might happen… 1st there might be a power failure, or the projector won't work, or the power point won't work, or I won't work, because as you know my mind blanches on pressure!! Many things actually could have happened…
But I went, and did it. My heart was not pounding, and my hands were not shivering… I was OK, because the people who were there were my people, my family.
Somehow it felt safe to be there, talking to them.
What deserves to be highlighted here is not that I vanquished my fear; it is how lucky I am to be with such wonderful and lovely people, and how I appreciate and respect them.

it did happen....

There are certain points in life that are significant enough to be highlighted and considered as a turning point, a hall mark.

One of these is the time when you find yourself able to see things that have always been there yet, you were unable to perceive.

Recently I had one of those moments, and for some reason it made me create this knew blog spot.
This site wasn't supposed to be for sharing an experience or expressing an opinion, but I will do so… I will talk about me, and I will talk about a close friend.

I had a look at my other website, which is 5 years old now!! I see how things were somehow silly and immature, yet I won't delete it. After all it is still my site. I was that person, and what said then was true and honest, and in fact I still mean most of it.
So I won't delete it and make it as if it was never there, because in fact it did